


You Loser

by WrathoftheStag (Mwuahna)



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Flirting, Hannibal is smitten, Hannibal is still a cannibal, Hannigram - Freeform, Hey Jealousy, Idiots in lust, M/M, crack adjacent, ficlet inspired by prompt, i mean it could happen, jack is too old for this shit, season 1 AU, team sassy science instigates shit, team sassy science ships hannigram, will is a jealous fool, will is thirsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-29
Updated: 2016-10-29
Packaged: 2018-08-27 17:54:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8410960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mwuahna/pseuds/WrathoftheStag
Summary: Team Sassy Science, Hannibal, Will and Jack find themselves stranded in a small town bar while waiting for their car to get towed.  Someone gets hit on.  Someone gets jealous.  Shenanigans ensue.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hannibalnuxvoxmica](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hannibalnuxvoxmica/gifts).



> Hannibalnuxvomica asked for a fic based on this prompt, “Fuck me, you loser.” 
> 
> And I also had this prompt on Tumblr:  
> 
> 
> So I killed two birds with one stone. Here's some cracky nonsense I came up with.

How they ended up at a local dive bar, outside of Bedford, was beyond any of them. Hannibal, Will, Team Sassy Science -- even Jack Crawford were there, stuck in East Jesus Nowhere on their way back from a case in Pittsburgh.

All of them had gone in an unmarked FBI van to examine a crime scene suspected of belonging to the Ripper. It had been a rather gruesome one, and after a long day dealing with grumpy local feds, a botched crime scene that was definitely not the Ripper’s, and crappy food, the stupid van -- or Lab on Wheels as it was affectionately known -- decided to conk out on the side of the road. It would be a couple of hours before a tow would reach them, even with the Bureau’s help. 

And so, the group found themselves walking down a semi deserted road to make their way to Lucinda’s Lounge. The only place open at 10:30 at night.

“No one talk to me,” Jack grumbled. “I just want a drink and to be left alone with my thoughts.”

“Then maybe you should have stayed in the van?” Zeller replied. Beverly shot him a look to shut up before Uncle Jack gave it to him, but good.

Will and Hannibal walked behind at the end of the group, as Will said quietly, “I bet you’re glad you came with us, aren’t you?”

Hannibal unbuttoned the top button of his shirt and said with a smile, “True, it’s not how I envisioned my Saturday night to be -- but at least the company is agreeable.”

Will grinned, and looked at the ground, as they continued walking, “Come on, I’ll buy you a drink.”

Jimmy exhaustedly pushed his way through the door and the group poured in. Everyone in the bar turned to give the newcomers a once over while Whitesnake played on the juke box.

Beverly, Jimmy, Brian and Jack found a booth in the corner and shoved themselves into it. Everyone tired, a little grimy, and a lot of grumpy. 

“My seat is sticky,” Jimmy said to no one in particular.

“Yeah, sticky is the least of your worries. You’re lucky if you don’t leave here with crabs,” Brian replied as he looked around the bar with a wrinkled nose.

Hannibal and Will stood in front of the booth, and then Will asked, “Okay, what does everyone want?” 

Jack handed Will his company credit card and said, “A double shot of whiskey. Whatever you’re getting.”

“A beer.”

“A bourbon.”

“A vodka and cranberry.”

Everyone turned to look at Brian.

“What the hell is wrong with a vodka and cranberry?” Brian asked.

Beverly replied, “Nothing, if you’re 21 and it’s 1996.”

Will nodded, “Fine. We’ll be right back.” 

Hannibal followed Will to the bar to get everyone’s drink order in. By now, Hannibal had taken off his jacket and tie, and rolled up his sleeves. Will swallowed as he looked at Hannibal’s strong forearms, as he leaned against the bar.

“What can I get you?” the bartender asked.

Will repeated everyone’s request and then asked Hannibal, “What do you want?”

“Ah...how about a whiskey as well? Neat, please.”

The bartender nodded and got to work.

“So, if you weren’t here right now what would you be doing?” Will asked, genuinely interested in what Hannibal had to say.

“I would probably be in bed, reading. My life isn’t as exciting as you imagine it to be, Will.”

“Well I---”

“Hi, there.” 

Will and Hannibal both turned and saw a petite woman wearing cut off jean shorts and a red tank top. Her boots matched her tank top perfectly.

“Buy me a drink, handsome.”

Will, turned to see if she was maybe talking to someone else behind him.

“I’m sorry, I--” Will began.

She interrupted by saying, “Not you, curly. I’m talking to your friend over here, Mr. Cheekbones.”

Hannibal’s lips quirked, “Oh, certainly. Very well. What would you like, Miss…”

“Sherilyn. My name’s Sherilyn. I love your accent. So fancy!” she said as she walked closer to Hannibal and got in front of Will. “I’ll have a jack and coke.”

Will shook his head, “Um, excuse me.” Sherilyn ignored him completely. 

Just then, the bartender had everyone’s drinks ready, “That’ll be $38, you wanna start a tab?”

“Sure,” Will said as he stared at Sherilyn while she still chatted with Hannibal.

“Hannibal?” Will pressed in closer, “Here’s your drink.”

“Oh, thank you Will.” Hannibal took his whiskey and continued talking with Sherilyn who was discussing her job at Lucinda’s. She’d apparently just gotten off her shift.

“You’re a doctor? Well, handsome and smart!” Will heard Sherilyn saw as he walked to the group with some of their drinks. He couldn’t carry them all and clearly Hannibal wasn’t going to help.

“What’s going on over there?” Beverly asked with a raised brow.

“Here’s your beer, bourbon, and vodka cranberry,” Will said angrily slamming down Brian’s drink, “I’ll be back with your whiskey, Jack.”

“Will?” Jimmy asked with a smirk. “Are you okay?”

“What? Yeah, sure. I’m fine.”

“Who’s Hannibal’s new friend?” Beverly asked as they all leaned over to get a better look.

“It’s none of our business,” Jack said as he began eating popcorn from the red plastic basket on the table.

“How should I know? He just started talking to her,” Will replied curtly.

Brian kicked Jimmy under the table, who in turn punched Beverly in the knee. 

“Oh, wow,” Beverly said. “They look like they’re really hitting it off.”

“It’s none of our business!” Jack said again.

“She doesn’t seem like his type, but you know what they say. Opposites attract,” Jimmy called out as he took a sip of his beer.

“Jesus, you people.” Jack said as he got up. “I’m going outside to call and check on the status of the tow truck.”

Will turned around to look at Hannibal and Sherilyn at the bar, Sherilyn was now laughing and had her hand on his shoulder. Will turned back quickly.

“And you three, knock it off,” Jack whispered as he got up, walked to the bar to grab his drink then walked out the door.

“Will, you should go back there. Maybe Hannibal is stuck talking to her and is too polite to get himself unstuck,” Beverly said.

“Dude. That’s happened to me so many times!” Zeller said.

“Which part? Being too polite or being hit on?” Jimmy asked, “Because frankly I don’t believe either.”

“I think he wants to talk to her,” Will said suddenly feeling as though his stomach had dropped twelve floors. He looked over at Hannibal, how he leaned against the bar, smiled and nodded, took a sip of his drink, how he wanted to run his fingers through his hair and --- wait, what? Will was suddenly hit with the realization that maybe _he_ wanted Hannibal.

He took Beverly’s bourbon and slammed it back in one gulp.

“Hey!” she protested, then quieted down when she saw the look on Will’s face.

“Holy shit,” Will muttered in disbelief.

“Will?” Beverly said calmly, “why don’t you send him a text and see if he needs help getting out of that situation?”

“Ooo, yeah. Do that!” Brian said.

Will sighed, “Christ. What is my problem?” as he took out his phone and sent Hannibal a text. Jimmy sat excitedly watching and eating popcorn.

 _Are you okay? Do you need any help?_ Send.

Hannibal stopped talking to Sherilyn and then pulled out his phone. He read it and smiled briefly.

_Yes, please. Thank you, Will. You left me and did not come back._

“What did he say?” Jimmy asked.

“He said he needs help,” Will said watching them still at the bar.

“Go over there! Help the man, for god’s sake,” Beverly called out. “And bring me another drink!”

Will marched over there, body language assured and ready to battle.

“There goes our baby, on his way to become a man,” Jimmy said.

“Yeah, let’s hope he doesn’t fuck it up,” Brian laughed.

The team sighed as they watched Will approach Hannibal and Sherilyn. Jack came back and sat down with a loud grunt.

“What’s going on?” he asked.

“Hannibal doesn’t want to talk to that woman, so Will is going to help him out,” Beverly said with a huge grin.

“Oh, Jesus,” Jack said. He paused then added, “Hand me that popcorn.”

Will had no idea what he was going to say, so he quickly ran through his mental rolodex of the few romantic comedies he’d seen throughout his life. Was he really doing this? Oh boy.

“I’m back. Sorry I took so long,” he said leaning into Hannibal, and placing a hand on his forearm. Hannibal suddenly stiffened; when Will said he would help, he certainly wasn’t expecting this.

Sherilyn looked confused for a moment, then ignored Will and continued talking to Hannibal. “I’ve never been to Baltimore, but I would love to visit.”

“Is this loser talking about the opera again?” Will asked.

“Loser?” Hannibal said turning to face him.

“Uh, no he hasn’t mentioned any operas,” Sherilyn said.

“Oh good. Once he starts talking about the opera, you can’t get him to shut up,” Will said as he then put his hand on Hannibal’s.

“Oh my god, are you seeing what I'm seeing?” Beverly asked.

“I didn’t know Graham had it in him,” Zeller laughed.

“If he keeps that up, I think we all know what Graham will have in---”

“Jimmy!” Jack said. “You three...I can’t take you anywhere. I’m going outside again. This is none of my business.”

“More for us,” Jimmy said quietly.

“He’s not going to bring my drink, is he?” Beverly said.

“No,” Brian and Jimmy replied.

“Fuck that noise,” she said as she got up and walked to the bar. 

“Aaaaand there she goes,” Brian said then began to chew on his straw. 

“Hey, fellas! Will, you were supposed to get me another drink. Hi, I’m Bev,” she said extending her hand to Sherilyn.

“Hey. Sherilyn,” she said shaking Beverly’s hand without enthusiasm.

“So I see you’ve met Will and Hannibal. Yep, good old Will and Hannibal. Hannibal and Will. They’re cute, right?” Beverly continued.

Will and Hannibal looked at her as if she were insane.

“Bourbon, please?” she said to the bartender. He nodded and served it right up. “Well, I guess I’ll go back with my friends and leave you with these two.” She nodded and walked back quickly.

“So are you two a couple, or what?” Sherilyn asked point blank.

Hannibal remained silent and Will said, “Yes, he’s mine.” Then quite unexpectedly leaned in and kissed Hannibal on the lips. The eruption of cheers coming from the booth at the other end of the bar was undeniable.

Sherilyn balked as Hannibal then quickly seized the moment to cup Will’s face and kiss him in earnest, mouths instantly opened and exploring; Will feeling his feet give out underneath him. Jack walked back into the bar, took one look, and walked right back out. Team Sassy Science was jumping up and down, hitting one another, and Sherilyn shook her head and walked away.

When they finally broke the kiss, it was Hannibal who said, voice low and intent, “I admit, I’ve been wanting to do that and more, for quite some time -- to hold you in my arms, feel you pressed against me, explore every inch of you. I need to have the taste of you in my mouth.”

Will stood speechless, his hands still on Hannibal, clutching at his shirt; the clarity of the situation and his emotions hitting him like a truck. And for the first time in his entire life Will Graham was 100% sure of what he wanted, who he was, and who he wanted it all with. His response? Simple and to the point.

“I think you should fuck me, you loser.”


End file.
